Saturday, July 01, 2006
"free wi-fi for all"
after being in new york for about a week, i find that it's necessary to make a list:
1. use a "the map" because it's fine if you don't know where you are.
2. eat good food, because everything tastes good if you're hungry enough.
3. overheard conversations on the subway are some of the best in the universe.
4. nothing is surprising in new york. well almost.
5. hipsters in new york are all very stylized, yet not necessarily stylish.
6. teenagers are hardcore. and so are their siblings.
7. ikea in jersey is scary huge and their hot dog deal can't be beat.
8. i'm due for some big break soon. i'm vying for w/in the next month.
other than that, it's been great. i got caught in a bangkokian-like rain storm, saw a great free brazilian girls concert at the hudson river, found delicious home-style comfort food spots, and went on a voyage of beer.
this is going to be something.
---
Monday, June 26, 2006
" hella out "
5 hours away from the red-eye. still packing.
my muscles ache in that way that the body reminds you that even though it's summertime BBQ badmiton, you still need to stretch before and afterwards.
i ate gordos for the last time today; a chicken quesadilla. i think either i'm nervous about not being done packing, or i have food poisoning. either way it's too late.
and where is y driver's license? did i drink that much last night? damn darts...
i'm going to miss the bay area. the people. the weather. the way the ocean and the forest are accessible for potential day-trips.
yes, the red-eye out. thanks to the advent of digital television transmissions, i'll most likely not sleep and eat food that is bad for you and arrive frazzled, weakened, and otherwise disrupted.
or not.
it's on to brooklyn, nyc. this is the next step.
---
Sunday, June 18, 2006
" sweet summer "
it's all about the barbeque. all of the miscellaneous meat and vegan treats and how they don't touch or interact, but they are allowed to be on the same table.
it's all about the friends you bump into; those forgotten faces from deep memory, resurfacing and all at one fleshed out and interactive.
it's about friends who have kids now and they are tiny humans running around talking and playing and forming sentences and reflecting all of the things in the world that they know to be current in their notion of reality.
it's about dirt-field softball games with the super bay area ghetto family in the pit next to you. it's about the family of man. it's about frisbee in the california sun underneath a cloudless sky; the dogs running loose and the sound of kids laughing.
it's all about meeting people that you haven't seen for years, and how they remembered you and how they are glad to see you. it's about how we used to be neighbors and now we're exchanging emails with the intent to keep in touch and meaning it.
it's how it's all real and all here and all overwhelming and normal all at the same time. it's all about the feeling of the real beginning of summer, and how everything from that point on is going to be full and rewarding.
so yay summer.
yay.
---
Thursday, June 15, 2006
" FYI "
for those few limited people who actually care about my whereabouts, i'll now be leaving the bay area on the 26th, and i suppose arriving in the brooklyn area on the 27th (flight-time and taxi-riding time pending).
so if you're saving up your hang-out time for a special day, hit me up. and if you're waiting for my in nyc...i'll be there soon-ish-like.
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Tuesday, June 13, 2006
" at odd angles "
ah california, will your coastal wonders and inland experiences never cease to amaze?
and one for the bay:
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Monday, June 05, 2006
" cross-country nerdery "
---
so brent calls me up when i'm eating some lunchy snack thing i whipped up in my spare time, and he says the usual intros and salutations.
then he asks me if i'm online. sadly enough i am.
he wants me to sign in as him on ebay to bid in his name on a surfboard that he's described as the perfect ride. that's weird and what a strange request, but then again maybe not?
there's something about the things that we, in this specific point in american technomodernism, decree as "normal." our mobile-phone-call-ebay-bidding-while-driving-west-to-east (deep breath here) me-in-my-house-him-at-the-DQ-in-god-knows-where conversation/transaction was almost too much to be true, and then again completely normal at the same time.
so kudos brent. congratulations on your new surfboard.
oh yeah, i forgot to tell you that i also got you a wholesale crate of ukrainian midget donkey porn. so um, should i have sent that to your new apartment, or do you think that your mom can forward your mail from her place?
call me soon. muah ahah ahaha ahah ahah.
zing.
---
Saturday, June 03, 2006
Friday, June 02, 2006
" the whitehorse debacle "
so there's a good friend of mine who is going to have her 25th birthday get-together planned at a place called The Whitehorse Inn.
free couch-sitting, free hotdogs, free los angeles atmosphere?
who says that socali doesn't rival norcal? i guess me, as i state that all the time. but maybe this time, the la-la version of the whitehorse can be loads better than the berkeley/oakland version of the whitehorse.
and this one has real hotdogs unlike the bay area one, which has old men that want to touch you inappropriately while drinking and smiling at a tilt.
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Monday, May 29, 2006
" socali is so cali, dude "
southern california needs to stop speeding on the freeways. it's ridiculous.
when you're coming up on a super-traffic jam that spans an entire county and then when you encounter the problem, which turns out to be four cars in a massive accident including women and children and overturned SUV's and too-big-for-humans-to-be-considering-a-normal-sized-vehicle
(deep breath here)
but-bought-and-driving-it-anyways-depite-the-price-of-gas truck, then there's gotta to be something said.
whether it's pretty purple pollution sunsets in LA or another accident just 500 meters down the way on the opposite side of the 5, you all need to drink some chamomile tea and just sit on the sidewalk to reflect on what's really your destination.
big up to kasia for the aquarium day in monterey, big up to seeing jenny a. in some random cafe restaurant in silver lake LA, and big up to san diego for one of the most loveliest sunsets recorded in my mind since returning back to america.
let's hope that the animals at the san diego zoo tomorrow are just as luminous and magnetic.
---
Saturday, May 20, 2006
" yaymerican: reverse culture shock "
it's all about going to the city, four days after returning. the BART train slowly filling up like a metal grinder; humans the size of wealth and access squeezing into public transportation with their digital-age woes.
it's all about "regular-sized nachos" at la corneta's in the mission, and how it didn't fit into my stomach. regular should mean enough, but for some reason as i return to the states, regular means a portion created out of the need for the most for your buck. this ultimately means consumption of the amount of food that one would not need to be sated, but the amount of food that one feels they deserve because they have money befitting such a gimungously-sized meal.
it's all about excess and skimming off of the surface of things. there is a veil over my eyes as i re-integrate. there are mirrors all around me and no one else sees their reflections.
it's all about all of the noises of american cities rivals even the loudest southeast asian ones. i oddly enough found myself offended the other day by sounds of the english language permeating all the spaces around me.
it's all about these constant new noises which detail just how long i've been away, and the sound of laughing. there are teenagers rollicking in the street, heavy with their newly acquired parentally-guilt-tripped and undeserved gadgetry who move to impress their own above all others.
it's all about trying to always be aware and to find these things that make up what you stand for and who you are, what you like, what you are like, and how you will reflect those parts of you that feel the need to communicate the most out into the open spaces beyond your shell.
---
it's all about late nights out with old friends. you share memories in wooden rooms. the memories of days past intermingle with a deep interest in "what's going on now with you," and how seemingly more wonderful that is and those are after two beers.
it's in the small things about them. the romanticized versions of your friends that blossom into sketches of people that you love. people that meant something to you at a time, and still remind you that no matter how long you've been away, there are still people that can help reaffirm that it's okay to move forward yourself.
it's all about the commitment to the moment.
---
Thursday, May 18, 2006
" adjusting "
it's going to take a little while. i can see that now.
the cold that wasn't so cold then, is at such a subtle level, that i find it nearly unbearable.
claratin is over-the-counter. the comicbook store was missing...although later i found out it was to my immediate right.
burt's bees lip balm comes now with honey, which is a nice touch. whole foods still makes big ass sandwiches...although now i'm going to have to factor in spending near $6.50 on a sandwich.
the parkway speakeasy still has great atmosphere, although i had to remember that now that i'm home, i can place my feet on the chairs at leisure.
my new nyc sim card is almost here. i think.
everything is slowly coming into focus, and it's time for some newfound clarity.
welcome home indeed.
---
Monday, May 15, 2006
" first things first "
see the neighbors, check!
jackets, check!
eat some proper baked goods, check!
photograph nearest person that i said that i would when i was in thailand, check!
grub on a gordo's carnitas burrito, super check!!
get a new cell phone #/plan thingie, uhhhh...
why are all the dudes in these cell phone service provider places dressed thusly? there's something about the pseudo-professional short haircutted, meticulously trimmed or shaven facial hair designs, the usage of slightly-knowledgeable-yet-slightly-condescending language and tones when speaking with (potential) customers.
all i need to do is get the plan that i need, not the suggested one that should be the one that i need. there is no service plan that is necessarily "sexy" or "hot" in the way that could be used when spitting game. and i don't even play the game.
how would it look like if you were chopping it up with some person and they asked you with that i'm-letting-you-know-that-i'm-interested tone, "what cellular mobile service provider do you use, and also what is your plan; one year or two?" i mean it sounds silly, so no sir or ma'am, no. no thank you. i do not require that plan you are trying to sell to me.
and also, everyone knows that no one group of friends all use the same provider, so where then is the incentive to list unlimited nationwide mobile to mobile service as a feature of any plan? it means you're trying to glorify the one feature that is almost trivial.
how many of your friends actually will use the same service provider, or use a mobile phone at all? that feature listed is like those signs at theme restaurants that state, "smiles are for free!" don't you just feel like punching the manager in the neck?
(insert blank stare here)
trying to adjust to americana and sociocultural isms after one day of being back in the states and still slightly jet-lagged, getting there.
---
" america is sniffly "
so cold in the bay area. coming out of a temperate zone and into a refridgerator. or something subtle and extreme at the same time.
and culture shock! reverse culture shock. boo america for being so overwhelming at times.
i went out this morning to get some baguettes and baked goods and my spot wasn't open. in fact it was so not open, it didn't open until 8am. what the deal is that?
if you were a good bakery that did on-site baking for the masses of people who wanted well-baked baked goods, wouldn't you get up at 2-4am and open up at 6? i think so. and in that vein, i was disappointed to the point where i had to go somewhere else.
so over a pretty decent apple danish of some sort, i'm sniffling my way back into this time zone. gotta get a phone today, which is sad because of the convenience of it. sigh.
we'll see how this pseudo-head cold develops. here's to new adventures abound.
---
Sunday, May 14, 2006
" home home "
after a fury of packing and stressing and being agitated beyond necessary, i'm leaving thailand for home.
how does one leave home for home?
memories, experiences, dreams, and realities.
coming across these paths again for this time which has past in this way, makes me feel able to continue onwards.
without regret, without anything holding me back.
thanks to all the people who made these things possible.
see you when i get there.
---
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
" mikey likes it "
now i'm usually not one for internet advertising, but this one was just funny enough to catch my eye.
good job evil corporate america. you done one okay.
---
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
" four more days "
four more days, and many yet to go.
these are the last days for me, here, for now.
how long has it really been? what did i do here? what did i accomplish?
what will i do there, then?
and all the notions of shifts and change come over me all at once.
good-bye thailand. good-bye family. good-bye songkhla, the south, and all of the history there. good-bye second homeland. good-bye origins and veiled answers. good-bye immersion. good-bye humidity in that way that never is replaced. good-bye food and fruits. good-bye large blue skies; larger than anywhere else. good-bye everyone and everything.
---
in each and every moment from the one previous, you have to decide whether you're going to get going or stay put. and if the moment before can be described as a little over two years, then it is the time for me to get going.
it's time to pick up the pace. time to speak, with action these compiled thoughts of artistry and reflection; to be these planned changes.
it's another step forward, and many to go.
wish me luck i my days to come.
tonight's homework:
write a letter to your friend. whichever one of your choosing. or it could even be a postcard. write to them how you feel about them. how you really feel.
if you were to never see them again. if you knew that they would never hear from you again, save this last communicated piece of writing. what would you say? do this, and be honest, and i promise you'll be closer to each other than you will ever imagine.
it is in these the small movements that we make the most deft impact.
---
Monday, May 01, 2006
" why even ask? "
1) why is thai pop music so immensely crappy?
2) why do i invariably find myself drawn into the crappy music videos about puppy dog love, rejection, school unrequited romances, and other less interesting fodder?
3) why do i want to purchase and catalog this crappy music for future generations of thai kids, so that they can remember how crappy their pop music was, so that they never ever recreate these crappy songs ever again?
in one sense then, i've come to the conclusion that i'm happy to be returning home soon.
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Thursday, April 20, 2006
" the weight of whispers "
if we are of the earth, meaning of the elements, the makeup of our beings being comprised of metals and liquids, atoms and complex structure, positive ionic relationships and cellular packets, then couldn't we say that our words are also comprised of these things?
thus, the word becomes an invisibly audible representation of all of our biological ingredients.
...
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Monday, April 17, 2006
" thoughts on the act of coming home "

---
the clouds lay low
over the frame of the city.
the delayed sounds of an airplane engine approaches
my open window
as the crafts' body recedes into the far distance;
a premeditated mechanized blip of light,
the only sign of its presence among
the vastness of the atmosphere.
---
Thursday, April 13, 2006
" maintenance est tres difficile "
it's been very difficult to maintain this blog thing in the past couple of months. it's true.
i apologize to myself first, because this used to be a great place to get all of the things off of my chest, out of my head, and flush all the contaminants out from my body.
so i am going to try and get to it.
---
for the past month i have been traveling through cambodia and vietnam. i've just returned to bangkok thailand and tomorrow is the official thai new year's, better known as Songkran, or the water festival. i'll try to stay dry and just mentally cleanse myself of the past year.
details to come perhaps if i don't remain lazy.
i'm coming home again (to the bay area) for the second time in two years. i'm going to stay a month this time then move to new york, cause that is what you are supposed to do; move, experience, grow, move back, move on.
i'm wishing myself luck, although with the support so far, i doubt i'll need much more than a viable financial income. i'll keep you posted my faceless cyberpals.
---
in other news:
"two years later..."
Host:
c. bay milin
Location:
albatross pub
1822 san pablo avenue
berkeley, CA View Map
When:
Friday, May 19, 9:30pm
Phone:
don't call them, email me
---
the funny thing about people who come home after a long time away, is that they for some reason expect everyone that they know to come greet them upon arrival. sadly the world is busy with jobs, obligations, meeting of importance, kids, prior engagements, and laziness.
with that, i am returning home...again...to the bay area. i want to invite all of you to come help reinsert me into american culture by buying me beer, shaking my hand, or playing darts or giving me free stuff (detailed below).
it's not unruly of me to ask for your attendance or for free shit is it? it's america! and from what i've heard about america in the past two years...it's doing something. and it'll be friday.
what better way to bring in the weekend than with a drunken night with your friendly neighborhood bay?
and you have a month to pencil me in as well, so no excuses.
so with that, come welcome me home, before i go off to nyc in june, cause that's where i'm going. i'm too lazy to write something sassy here, so i'm copy/pasting excerpts from the last time i came home's thingie thing:
i'm coming home from bangkok thailand and i'm broke too! you don't need to call or write a letter to congress, don't need to fret if you live too far or really really can't make it for personal reasons, and you don't need to wear a fancy shmancy nothin doin.
bring yourself, friends, lovers, cheap dates, kid sisters, cousins, friends-from-out-of-town, international exchange students, people i forgot, and even your dog if you want cause they letcha you know.
just come out and i'll spot yas for the 25 cent bowl of popcorn and a tipsy game of darts (no refund if i dart you in the leg). if you buy bay a guinness, you may sit back and enjoy his arms turn red with drunkedness!!
if you feel like getting me a "hello/goodbye again" present or supporting creativity and art for art's sake, i will ask you only for a photo or copy of photo of you as a kid at any age, old (comic) books or packaging/paper materials with graphic things on it that could be turned into 1" buttons, old/new x-rays from your injuries, accidents, or scans, one (or more) b/w photobooth strip(s) of you alone or with people or props (i suggest the booths at musee mechanique), and/or rolls of black and white film. if not don't worry; i wish for 4 hours of your time to make up for the 2 we've lost.
hit me up for more info. baystar23@gmail.com
ps- also, if you make it before i get sauced, can you guys give me your current contact information so i don't have to keep not contacting you all?
directions to beer, board games, dog-friendly atmosphere, pool tables, and people that know bay:
http://www.albatrosspub.com/
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