Monday, September 25, 2006

" a tale of peach cobbler coffee crumb cake "

---

i am the master baker.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

---

" i'm getting my bizake on " or " manbakeryonics "

---

there's nothing like coming home after a long arduous day of tempjobbery and post 9-5er shopping excursions at trader joe's (aka the crazy new yorker mish mash of people who don't know how to shop ever ever), and relaxing by baking.

oh yes, baking. that elegant tradition of getting flour everywhere, and toiling over a hot oven is back, and it's more super cool than ever.

in the oven right now is my first attempt at a peach cobbler coffee crumb cake. it's tough though when you have no inherent base skills in the area of baking.

i like to follow directions. i like to see the ingredients changing forms; the chemistry of it all is fascinating on those smaller levels. like fat babies giggling or loud horribly dressed couples fighting in public. the little moments of magic that make it all worth it.

...okay. just check on it.

click to see me checking in on it.

it's not done yet.

the hard thing too, is how strictly do you stick to the recipe. is it a good recipe? the best recipe? did i put too much baking power in it or not enough baking soda? when you half the amounts but forget to half the eggs, will the textural changes be that much more drastic?

these are the silent worries which flock around in my head when i'm waiting to see what delicious confectionous surprises await me.

i'm going to check on it again.

ooooh, i think it's done. it smells lovely. the peaches on top look a little dried out, but i'm sure the hidden inner peaches are still moist and sweet.the crumbs came out okay, even-sized, and have nicely browned.

i think it's a success.

---

Thursday, September 21, 2006

" it feels new "

---

sometimes it feels new.

the thoughts permeate your waking hours,

like a dream memory clouding your vision.


it has the texture of summer on its feet

as the suns' bright body wanes,

as the shadows lengthen,

as spring rounds the corner

and meets you in front of the 99 cent store.


sometimes it feels new;

the echo of its meeting trails.

as you hold it tightly to your body

as you go to sleep.

---

Thursday, September 14, 2006

" sweet jeebus, it's sweet home alabama "

---

i've never been to alabama, or to the southern parts of america long enough to actually get a good grasp on the vibrant cultural affectations that emanate from the southern cultural isms. so today was literally an adventure.

it's amazing what a telephone can do. you can call strangers all over the country and ask them premeditated things and they either choose to talk to you, or opt to not spend their time meandering through an almost-too-polite telephonic repartee.

i had to make calls today. many calls to alabama. many chances to let my ear-bones flutter in the sway of the southern morning corporate drawl. and why are they 99% women who are 72% sassy?

there's something about the upkeep of such things, like verifying information for records, or trying to talk your way into the confirmation of information. it's very much akin to trying to talk your way into an ice cream cone bite with a person who in all seriousness, wouldn't give anyone a bite of their ice cream cone.

it's not even a matter of flavor, and although mine is usually strawberry, you know, the kind with those ginormous hunks of strawberry that you can bite into and then your teeth get all cold and it's so delicious and when the ice cream is all creamy and non-gelatinous it's so much better, then you feel all satisfied and glad you love ice cream because i do so much, yum!

it's a matter of being able to use the "office/phone" voice to sly your way into some stranger's confidence in you. it felt weird to be able to do it so well at times.

i guess the main point is people in alabama speak in a way that makes it hard to see past the drawl of the interaction. in my head i was picturing all of these ladies in their office pant-suits with too much make up on looking to go on their 15-minute break the second they placed the hands-free mic-phone apparatus on their head but just carefully enough to not muss up their annoyingly salon-ed hairdo.

i maybe just don't have a solid frame of reference, so everything is interesting and surprising all at the same time. nothing is really boring, if you're paying attention to what the inputs are. there's too much to notice, it's a wonder i can get lost in the exercise of "work" at all.

but, i don't think that i'm cut out for an office gig in the long term. i suppose while i'm getting through it, i find that it's actually quite interesting. this is what some people are doing with their lives?

how curious.

how curious indeed.

---

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

" now i'm a temp? "

---

too true, too true.

it really does come down to money doesn't it? i mean, you can try to stick to your guns but in the end, it'll come back to haunt you for ever believing that you could live on your talents for long (meaning w/out proper contacts, exposure, a "name" that carries upon the winds, a solid gold resume, and experience in the specific area that you wish to pursue).

it's a rough gig.

so now i'm temping. i am a temporary human database-entrant. i am the guy in the office that asks all of the questions at different intervals throughout the day which seem annoying because i don't know what's going on at all...yet.

i am the person with the great shoes that i bought a) because i had to get nice dress/work shoes for my dress-up days/work days, and b) because you can never look less awesome with superfresh shoes.

i am the guy who didn't make a peep to anyone the first day all day long so that i could self-teach myself the extremely-complex-at-first-but-gradually-and-oddly-intuitive software program in a matter of 20 minutes.

i am the worker bee that didn't ask for a lunch break, or where the bathroom was, if there was a policy on anything at all, or even when i should go home. yes. i am that temp that didn't leave until an hour and a half after everyone and their mom left the entire floor empty, save the cleaning staff which of course had to be non-white in total.

it's the second day, and as much as i super-enjoy looking at neon pink sheets of paper and neon orange starburst post-it's all day long in a just-too-cold-to-not-wear-a-jacket office, i have to remind myself why i'm doing it.

1) because i need to dream.

2) because to fulfill some dreams you need to have cash money.

3) because sometimes a hope and fairy dust wishes are not things that help you get money.

3.5) because angel dust is not actually fairy dust.

and

4) because although i hate money, i hate not having it when i need to get equipment and film and cameras and a monitor and all of the food that i didn't eat on my lunch break which i took at 3pm.

it's a tough gig, but i'm hunkering down people. wish me luck.

---

tonight's homework:

sleep. sleep as much as you can, for as long as you can so you can shower, brush your teeth, get some breakfast, do your face things, get dressed, get on the train, get to your "job" on time, and when you sit down in front of the computer screen you're going to make visual love to all day, you won't go crazy.

ps-eye drops save you from having a contact lens pop-out. also, remember to blink.

---