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oh it's on now. i mean, not like it wasn't on before. it's just so on. bring it.
i feel like i'm past hitting the stride; the gears are lubricated and i'm reeling. i am going to leave this office. i am.
i am going to leave here because i must. isn't it funny, meaning messed up, that you feel attached to the people you work with, and maybe won't actually leave, because you worry that you are abandoning them in a swirl of craziness? thoughts turn to their potential facial expressions as i take those steps out of the door.
but it must be done. i find that the time spent here is mildly rewarding on a work level; i get challenged, but are they the right sort of challenges? only in the wide sense of production, yes. but there's so much more to do, more ground to cover, more things to be done yet.
my feet are firmly planted in these notions of occupational escape, and the plans are laid. there is no doubt, unless there is, that i will leave here. somehow i feel like i am at a fork in the road, but not the fun kind where both of them lead forward or both have an apple turnover at the end near the hypothetical cul du sac. no.
this one is a fork where one path leads forward in a curve, and the other just is wide and spread to an obvious plain where you can see everything laid out before you. i find that it is very clear that i am drawn to see what's around the bend.
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