" story # 5: lines - fools don't give a fuck "

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i'm at a P.T.T. gas station buying some snackies in the convenience store. there's a handful of people inside the spot, and they're all browsing. the line is short enough and i decide that i have enough snacks. i'm ready to purchase.

i'm standing at the counter looking the 18 year-old attendant dude in the eyes, and he said hello. i'm placing my to-be-bought items on the counter and scooting them forwards a little, as if to signify their status as 'ready to be transferred as consumer goods' into 'personal items for private consumption.'

zzziiip! an old man stealthily ninjas his way somehow under my arm and places his single can of Leo beer on the counter. with his other (slight-of) hand, he pushes a crumpled old pair of twenty-baht bills right past, up and into the open hands of the attendant.

'a-buuuh??' my reaction is. where did such an old man come from. surely a vapor of a creeping entity such as this has the years of such a practice firmly under his belt.

i'm sort of quixotically looking at counter-dude now, an internal wondering feeling coursing through my body. i'm about to reinstate my products to their previous status as goods to be paid for...all of a sudden (!!!) the old man's ninja-ass buddy is coming at me from the low and left!

'whhhaaaa??!?,' i'm asking with my now all cock-eyed crazy look. he too is well practiced at the art of sneaky tom-foolery i can see. his hands already thinking out the process of cutting in front of me, not a care in all of the glowing silver hairs on his speckled head.

i mean, all dude is going to do is ice that bland pee-water beer down anyways, as is the style due to the temperature here. i am laughing out loud and no one gets me, cause no one here cares about lines or queues or the structure of waiting or patience in any form. it is a laughable occasion.

i'm thinking to myself 'am i ever going to leave this line ever, or just wither here in the heat of multiple ninja-like old men buying drunk-in-a-can all ninja-gaiden style?' the electronical 'boop/beep doong-doo' noises blip on and off as more people enter and exit the store; each one has a secret plan to wait for no one at all, and i'm standing there like a seashell in the ocean.

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